All the money we save on Tampax, Pads and Midol can now be spent on Chocolate and Wine.
In light of all these earthquakes we’re having here in California – I’m going to buy a Sleep By Numbers bed.
I’m pretty sure my number will be somewhere between 5.1 up to bend over and kiss your ass goodbye!
Put six eggs, cheese & spinach in a bowl this morning in case we have another Earthquake.
Thinking it will be the easy-peasy way to prepare my Quiche later!
I did Yoga this morning…..naahhhhh….
I did put on Yoga pants though!
Young guy just asked for my opinion because he said I looked like the kind of girl who could grow a mustache.
As soon as he regains consciousness, I’m going to call his mom to pick him up!
Lux, the 22 pound cat who attacked an Oregon family is now being held at a shelter.
The following is the transcript from the call placed from inside the bedroom of the Oswald residence:
911: This is 911. What’s your emergency?
Caller: Le at as gun nts…o mi gd!
911: Sir, please calm down, I can’t understand you. What is your emergency?
Caller: Le at as gun nts…
911: I’m sorry sir, it sounds like the cats got your tongue…
Caller: LES, LES, LES
and so sometimes, I just have to tell myself…
it’s not worth the jail time!
I was just beer battering some fish and the freaking bottle broke!