BOOK REVIEWS – My Love Page

HERE’S WHAT READERS ARE SAYING ABOUT

“BITCH PLEASE”

…the book I blogged!

(FORMERLY KNOWN AS “SHIT MY VAGINA SAYS!”)

  • JACQUI BROWN, a modern Robin Williams, the names might as be
    interchangeable. This woman can write and it is all original stuff. Her
    observations will make you burst out laughing. Such a talented
    storyteller with her approachable style and quick wit. She made us laugh
    every night on vacation. Well done

    ____________________

  • This is one of the funniest, most down-to-earth, terrific books I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. From the first page I was cracking up. And I mean belly laughing!!!! This book is full of wit and humor and thoughtfulness and wonderfully naughty anecdotes. As menopause is (please God) still about a decade away for me, I’m sooo happy I read this so that I’ll know that if I turn into an insane lunatic, that’s okay and to be expected. 😉

    Sincerely ladies, you will not regret reading this book. In fact, you’ll be so happy that you did you’ll probably tell every girl you know about it and insist that they read it too. It’s THAT good.

    I highly recommend this for all the ladies out there. And guys, if you are having trouble figuring out why your once-kind woman has turned into a babbling, knife-wielding, sweaty lunatic, read this book and you’ll understand why. 🙂

    Simply wonderful!!

    _____________________

    Jacqui Brown is smart, funny and witty!
    Once I started reading this book I couldn’t put it down!
    It made my day!

    _____________________

    Imagine that you’re sitting at your kitchen table on a Saturday night with your favorite cold beverage in your hand, and across from you is an insanely witty and gabby friend who has been there, rolled in that, ripped the t-shirt to shreds, and survived to tell the tale. And tell it she does, with complete candor and a point of view that will have you snorting with laughter. Jacqui Brown has never met a subject too sensitive to bare all about. Belly flab? Bring it on. Menopause? Puh-lease. I found myself immersed in every chapter, completely consumed by her honest and hilarious look at the trials and tribulations so many of us go through. At the end of every chapter I found myself looking to see what the next topic was. You’ll enjoy this twisted romp through Jacqui’s life and mind, and I’ll bet her eyes-wide-open look at life’s speed bumps will get you reflecting about your own way of viewing the world. Highly recommended!

     ______________________

    The menopause is for most women a deeply unfunny experience – but in the wonderfully mad, comic world of Jacqui Brown it transforms into constant hilarity and non-stop entertainment. Jacqui’s hysterical anecdotes fly thick and fast, and as her menopausal alter ego creates marvellous mayhem, the laughs keep piling up. The joy of it all is that this woman is not only naturally hilarious, but also a damned good writer! Highly recommended.

    _______________________

    Jacqui’s lighthearted, humourous and down-to-earth writing style makes this candid and absolutely hilarious book about “the change”, a MUST-READ! You will find yourself not just chuckling to yourself, but laughing heartily out loud at her extremely entertaining anecdotes. Once you start reading, you won’t be able to put it down! Thank-you Jacqui, for the laughs 😀 I just loved this book and I can’t wait for Volume 2!!

    ________________________

    Jacqui Brown has written an absolutely hysterical book that every woman who has gone through or about to go through menopause must read! Bitch Please is a book you will not want to put down. It’s a laugh out loud book that I promise will make you want to read over and over. Definately 5 stars!

    _________________________

    Bitch Please is absolutely hysterical!!! JB’s sense of humor is off the chart in this book. You won’t be able to put it down. Love, love, loved it. Hot Flashes, Insomnia, weight gain and oh those muffin tops. Why!!!! She explains it all. Have fun reading “Bitch Please”.

    __________________________

    There’s nothing like getting all dolled up and having a girls night out, especially after a few rounds of drinks, when we find ourselves laughing about things we previously thought we’d be mortified to admit. Those are the moments we learn that we’re all struggling with the same issues; hormones, weight gain, the horror of catching a reflection of our aging ass in the mirror…Jacqui captures all of these moments with honesty and self-deprecating humor.
    Reading Jacqui’s book is like a tipsy girls night out, but the good news is, you don’t have to wear make up or heels. Instead, you can curl up in your flannel Pjs with your dorkiest reading glasses and of course, a glass of wine within reach, and enjoy a little girl-time with Jacqui Brown.

    ___________________________

    I want Jacqui as my new BFF. If you have gone through Menopause, you will get it and if you have not reached menopause, you will know where you are headed. Either way you will laugh so hard you will !@#$%^&*.

    ____________________________

    Some of us recall finding open cartons of milk inexplicably placed in pantries by our mamas, the same mamas whose pinched-looking red faces beaded with sweat taking time-outs with their heads stuck into open freezers hoping for a quick cool down fix. How it was explained then was, “Your mom’s going through The Change.” The Change. Someday we as middle aged women would know The Change ourselves. And we would commiserate with our girlfriends who were our sisters in that menopausal madness that we kept among ourselves and our favourite “woman’s doctor”.

    Well, Jacqui Brown rips the crocheted shawl off the shush-you-can’t-say-that explanation of our common experience of womenhood and no holds barred dissects the shit out of our bodily functions and makes us laugh (and – I’m sure – some blush). This is a really, really funny book. And I mean non-stop funny. Nothing is sacred. Not the vagina. Not the husband. Not the insanity. Without giving too much away, I will say that menopause is just one aspect of the very, very interesting life (and recovery of events therein) of a former small-town girl from Ontario who took a leap of faith in her youth to move to California and about which she has written in this and previous books. I give “Bitch Please” 2 sagging buttcheeks up!

    _____________________________

    Jacqui Brown delivers another funny as hell story about real life and all the ups and downs that occur. I have read 4 of her books already and enjoyed everyone of them.

    _____________________________

    “Erma Bombeck is probably sitting in heaven thinking, `What a delight that someone picked up where I left off’ only with a 21st century take on life. Each story is hilarious and when retold with Brown’s stand-up humor, well, you just have to read it for yourself! Absolutely hilarious!”

    _____________________________

“Hilarious………..the 21st Century’s Erma Bombeck! Wonderful!”

“I think you need to keep doing what you are doing!   If we go by the ‘laughter is the best medicine’ adage – you could close the pharmacies single handedly. Erma would be so pleased!”

“This book will make you snort coke out your nose!”

“Again, I laughed till my sides hurt. 
I look forward to your blogs, they make
 my day!”

“You bawdy, ballsy broad! Laughed me arse off!”

“I was so tired before I read this I thought nothing could make me laugh. But I felt a half ass laugh coming out and then I made my contribution to the story… if you know what I mean.. which means I just laughed more and more.. now I’m comatose.”

“I can’t stop laughing!  Who can’t relate to that?
 Wonderful!”

“OMG!!!!! If this is actually a true story, I think I am in love. Its great!!!! I am a follower now and am putting this in my favorites.”

“Thank God! I thought it was just me!!! Thanks for the laugh!!!”

“Okay, I thought I had issues with my fat. I can’t believe you’ve taken such measures, funny!”

“I think you missed your calling. You should be a stand up comic…!”

“You are just toooo funny!”

“Keep ‘em coming… no pun intended!”

“I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your blog! I laughed all the way through it!”

“I love your blog. Thank you for making me laugh. I really needed that.”

“This was the perfect thing for me to see at the end of my day, HUGE BELLY LAUGH!”

“It is amazing how many things that are so true in your own life can be so funny when someone else talks about the same things happening! Thanks!”

“Fresh, Fresh, Fresh — and honest, and funnier than shit!!!
 Thanks.”

“Tears in my eyes!”

“I just laughed so damn hard I woke up both my husband and my dog!”

“I am now done wiping the tears from my eyes, which enabled me to correct all the typos I made in my first sentence. I also was finally able to BREATHE again, OMG!. Okay, so I believe Tawnya was referring to gas during sex and your statement, “There has to be rules and this falls into the top ten.”

“Oh crap, I just laughed like a really loud loon again.”

“Giggles all around, and tears of laughter!”

“If this is what insomnia does to you, OMG – you are SO funny!”

“OMG!! You are sooo funny!! Loved T1 and T2; now this!”

“Just what I enjoy most with my first coffee…delicious delusions!”

“Thanks for the chuckle.”

“You are too funny!”

“I totally cracked UP while reading this, and I needed a laugh today.”

“I don’t have my Things anymore due to breast cancer, but I’ve had many years to get used to what I very publicly call my Boobs in a Box, so I truly enjoyed this post Jacqui.”

“I was laughing so much the guys I work with thought I was losing it!”

“I thought I was the only one who held conversations with myself!”

“This gave me a much-needed laugh!”

“When you write, all I can say is “how do I love thee, let me count the ways” A-Z, keep writing!”

“That piece is fabulous! Thanks for sharing it. 
No truer words were have been said!”

“You are sooo right on all counts! The original man cave!!
 All of a sudden I feel……empowered!!!!”

“Very funny . . . very true!!!!!”

“Wow! You are an awesome writer! I found your blog through my tag surfer, I’m so glad I decided to go surfing today. HA!”

“Hahahahahahahaha. Hadn’t seen this until now and I just wrote on another thread, the duct tape REALLY does work…you also wrote on that thread and pointed me here…glad you did, I love to start my day with a laugh…you’re great!”

“Too funny and so true…..”

“Well you almost lost me with the length until I saw the FUCK, SON OF A BITCH, SHIT…. then I KNEW I had to go read the whole thing…when did you get a window into my life?”

“Loved it.”

“I laughed out loud…something I needed!”

“I laughed so hard at the “he had to give himself a shot right in his wiener” and also cringed! Can’t wait to find the herbal libido booster.”

“Thanks for sharing, I had to send this to all my girlfriends!”

“You know I love your writing, busted! This is so good, a riot! ha! ha! ha! ha! Tears!”

“What a hoot….I needed a good laugh this morning. Your no nonsense, matter of fact approach to a natural and normal part of life was refreshing. We are all so up tight about this subject.”

“YOU POOR BABY, MAKE SURE YOU KEEP PUTTING IT ALL DOWN, LOVE IT!”

“I had to laugh at your post jbwritergirl, I don’t had A.D.D. but some days my mind goes a mile a minute & I find myself doing a million things at once.”

“I laughed at the story because we all do this to some degree or another. And it is funny in the telling.”

“Real life can be so funny! Especially in the retelling.”

“I can’t read these at work anymore! I am the only woman here & these men want to know what is so funny in my office!! I can’t wait for the next installment!”

“Hilarious!!!!”

“You are funny, very funny. I do hope there is a #3.”

“YOU’RE A RIOT!! GOOD WRITING, L.O.L.”

“I don’t think I can read your posts anymore….they exhaust me!”

“Oh, man, I can’t wait to read this to my hubby – he bought some Horny Goat Weed a few months ago, and once we found it didn’t work at all, we could at least get some great jokes out of it!”

“A Riot I Say, Ur A Riot!!”

“Candid honest straight up real blogs soooo Roc!!! Great Post!!!”

“Oh Lord. I am laughing. This is real. This is good. Totally you.”

“Turn off the TV, get out of Hollywood and join a Vagina Monologue Tour! LOL!”

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